My neighbor, Harold, was convinced his cat was a secret agent. He'd spend hours watching it, whispering into a toy walkie-talkie. One day, he burst through my door, wild-eyed and triumphant. 'I've cracked it!' he yelled. 'I know why Mittens keeps leaving those dead mice on my doorstep!'

Apparently, it was just her highly effective, albeit slightly macabre, business card.