My neighbor, old Mr. Henderson, always claimed he had a secret to eternal youth. Every morning, without fail, he'd go out to his garden shed with a strange, glowing liquid in a flask. One day, I finally cornered him and asked, 'Mr. Henderson, what is your secret? What do you drink from that flask every morning?' He winked at me, patted the flask, and said, 'It's a special blend, son.'

Turns out, his 'secret' was just a really potent energy drink; Mr. Henderson was actually just very, very caffeinated, and his 'eternal youth' was an anxiety disorder.